Iris Wildthyme Speaks...![1] was a self-contained narrative monologue segmented in the 2017 Christmas special of the BBC Radio 3 series The Verb.
The six-minute-long audio story is notable for currently being the only piece of performed Iris Wildthyme media not produced by Big Finish Productions, even including appearances of the character in Doctor Who audio stories. The story was written by Paul Magrs and starred Katy Manning as her incarnation of Iris Wildthyme.
Plot
Speaking to "ladies and gentlemen and gentle-beings of all persuasions", Iris Wildthyme introduces herself. She divulges information on her mode of transportation, the Celestial Omnibus. She then elaborates on her place in the universe. While she explains that she has lots of fun having adventures across the stars, she admits to often feeling lonely. To distract herself from this, she travels the universe, making friends, buying drinks and nibbles from offys, and shopping for fabulous clothing. Miming another individual, Iris has a conversation with herself, inviting her and her audience to wait for the day her bus arrives, so she can rescue them and take them a party.
Cast
Crew
References
- Iris lived through 1972 around seven times.
- Iris muses that her Celestial Omnibus might look more in place on "Regent Street in the pouring rain, pulling up at a bus stop on a dark December night".
- Iris refers to herself as "Aunty Iris".
- Iris claims that she investigates "spooky stuff", and that she prods maniacs, monsters, and fascists with sticks.
- She also believes that she is a "beautiful, sexy, intelligent, independent lady of means".
- Iris ponders if she is an archetype, a siren, a witch, a harpie, a femme fatale, or even a Valkyrie from Nordic myth.
- Iris chose her name "Iris", based off iridescence, her favourite word.
Notes
- Paul Magrs released the script for the story on his Patreon.[1]
- Iris says "ding ding" in reference to her Celestial Omnibus, which she also did in the unproduced stageplay An Unearthly Palaver. The script was included in the charity anthology Bafflement and Devotion: Iris at the Edges.
Continuity
- The Celestial Omnibus is the number 22 to Putney Common. (PROSE: Old Flames, The Scarlet Empress, TV: Rose, et al.)
- The Celestial Omnibus is smaller on the inside. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, Just the Ticket, Enter Wildthyme, et al.)
- The Celestial Omnibus' windows are prone to rattling in the time winds. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme)
- Iris often plays cassettes of Cilla, (PROSE: Preface) Dusty, (PROSE: Preface, et al.) and Shirley. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion, Enter Wildthyme)
- Iris is a transtemporal adventuress. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, et al.)
- The Celestial Omnibus is a Timeship. (PROSE: Going Once, Going Twice)
- Iris considers herself as a "righter of wrongs, and wronger of rights". (PROSE: The Blue Angel)
- Iris sometimes bumps into her old friend in his blue box, (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns, The Wormery, Muse of Fire, The Elixir of Doom, et al.) who is now is not a bloke. (TV: Twice Upon a Time, The Woman Who Fell to Earth)
- The Celestial Omnibus has a fully stocked wardrobe. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme)