The End of Time (TV story)

GALLIFREY RIIIIIISES!

   - James Bond, on making Earth his bitch

End of Time can be described as follows: RTD is sore about Moffat taking over and wants to screw everything up as much as possible. I mean, what other explanation is there for this complete and total piece of trash? Surely not RTD's writing skills, cos we all know that he's *~*the best television writer in Britain*~*, which is not a self-proclaimed title at all. Oh no, RTD is a humble, modest, good-hearted writer who only wants the best for his fans and characters. Hahah. Yeah, I bet I had you going there.

Once upon a time, on a planet called Earth, there was a dog in a headdress ( {]:3 ) named Rassilon. He liked to narrate the whoooole wide universe in a deep, booming voice that sounded suspiciously like James Bond. One day, he decided that Earth was an awfully boring place to be and so he just blew the damned place up. In the nick of time, however, Aslan swooped down from the sky with Dalek Caan running beside him and rescued the only people on Earth that the writers bothered to name. How convenient, just like all of RTD's plot twists. It should also be noted that when he rescued Luke Smith, he was about to get hit by a car because he was texting his BFF Clyde and not paying attention.

The rest of the episode turned out to be a long, drawn out b'awww fest in which RTD whined about not being able to bring his precious Rose back and the Master strangled chickens with his bare hands before devouring them whole. Martha wound up happily married to TOM MILLIGAN and anyone who thinks otherwise should really fix their TV because it happened. Plain as day, thank you very much. Wilf did some stuff like the BAMF that he is, while the Doctor wrote emo poetry about dogs in hats. Jack was too busy NOT HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH ALONSO to be in this episode. Meanwhile, the Ood sang filk songs about their OTPs and nothing much else happened.

Rassilon now lives in the Master's basement and has a part-time job as his bitch. Everyone lived happily ever after.

Except the Doctor, who is eternally depressed because it's AAALL HIS FAAULT even though nothing really happened. Well, aside from the world blowing up, but no one else really noticed anyways.