Bacon

From Tardis Wiki, the free Doctor Who reference

Bacon is an unusually tasty meat from the planet Earth. It is notable for its extreme deliciousness and the sense of well-being and contentedness it imbues to those who consume it.

History of Bacon

While not directly involved in the invention of Bacon, the Doctor did pave the way for its creation by helping the Tribe of Gum discover fire, thus creating the earliest method of cooking bacon. (DW: An Unearthly Child)

Bacon has been inextricably linked to many of humanity's greatest achievements, such as the wheel, the internal combustion engine, and space travel (methods of transporting bacon), written and spoken language (to record bacon recipies), and the time travel technology of the 51st century (useful for prolonging the shelf life of bacon).

Notable Bacon-Related Events

  • The Doctor decides to give up bacon and become a vegetarian after his experience with the Androgums. The lack of bacon in his diet causes him to become so frail that a mere bump on the head causes him to regenerate. (DW: The Two Doctors, Time and the Rani)
  • The Time Lords and Daleks fight the Last Great Time War, for the fate all of creation, including (by inference) all the bacon in history. This was undoubtedly a motivator for both sides.
  • The Slitheen modify a pig as a decoy in their invasion. The moral ambiguity surrounding its sentience and the high quantity of lead in its body make it unsuitable for baconization. (DW: Aliens of London)
  • The Doctor observes that the Daleks reconstituted from human dead are driven mad by "the stink of humanity". Had they smelled like bacon, the crisis would have been averted. (DW: The Parting of the Ways)
  • Without their human mouths and digestive systems, the Toclafane are unable to enjoy bacon. This us presumably what drives them mad, and they become psychopathic killers and pawns of The Master. (DW: The Sound of Drums)
Bacon