Rose sighting confirmed (short story): Difference between revisions

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Rose sighting confirmed (short story) (edit)

Revision as of 18:40, 6 June 2023

7,091 bytes added ,  6 June 2023
→‎Joseph Green
Tag: 2017 source edit
Tag: 2017 source edit
Line 111: Line 111:
! # || Character || Summary
! # || Character || Summary
|-
|-
! 1
| [[Murray (Rose sighting confirmed)|Murray]]
| Murray observes that Green has gotten rather large all of a sudden, adding that it's almost like he's got a whole other person inside him.
|-
! 2
| [[aderack]]
| aderack, who has heard that Green has a lot of [[enemy|enemies]], suggests that he could just be wearing a pile of [[kevlar]] [[vest]]s under his [[suit]].
|-
! 3
| [[bobs]]
| bobs suggests that someone, "quite ''cleary''", has been [[eating]] a lot of [[pie]]s.
|-
! 4
| [[Another Canuck]]
| Another Canuck quips that Green has put on so much [[weight]] recently because, like all [[politician]]s, he is full of [[hot air]].
|-
! 5
| [[robs]]
| robs suggests that someone, "quite ''clearly'', has been eating a lot of pies.
|-
! 6
| [[Andy (Rose sighting confirmed)|Andy]]
| Andy observes that, being an [[MP]] "and all", Green has the weight of [[England]] to run on his [[shoulder]]s.
|-
! 7
| [[Muntjac Man]]
| Muntjac Man reports that Green was spotted in [[Somerfield]] [[supermarket]] in [[Halstead]] on [[14 April]] buying [[100 (number)|100]] [[can]]s of [[insect]] [[repellent]] [[spray]].
! 8
| [[Chaz]]
| Chaz writes "[[Rice pudding|Rice Pudding]] for everyone".
|-
! 9
| [[icytrue]]
| icytrue quips that Green's weight gain is down to [[inflation]].
|-
! 10
| [[semp]] attributes Green's weight gain to too much [[junk food]] and suggests he eat [[apple]]s.
|-
! 11
| [[Glynn (Rose sighting confirmed)|Glynn]]
| Glynn agrees that it's just mean to attack Green for his weight problem, especially when his recent [[speech]]s have been so "unfocused". Glynn quotes "Our [[nation]] has nothing to [[fear]] at this time except... except the [[Big Bad Wolf|Big... Bad Wolf]].", asking what that was about.
|-
! 12
| [[Charles (Rose sighting confirmed)|Glynn]]
| Charles observes that Mickey is going "all [[The X-Files|X-files]] just because an MP gained some weight. Asking where the mysterious Doctor fits into all of this, he facetiously suggests that he is Green's new [[dietician]]. Charles points out that Green is not the only one at [[Westminster]] gaining weight, suggesting that all of them are probably just getting some [[American]] [[burger]]s or something.
|-
! 13
| [[Concerned]]
| Concerned asks that people be nice, suggesting that Green probably has some type of health condition.
|-
! 14
| [[JKDart]]
| JKDart suggests, with a [[groan]], that Green is just going in for being a political [[heavyweight]].
|-
! 15
| [[Bert Digby]]
| Bert is convinced that Green's weight gain is just a result of the usual [[luxury|luxuries]] at Westminster  and that's nothing to get hot and bothered about.
|-
! 16
| [[Steve Kelley]]
| Steve asks that Mickey includes details of the sighting of Green. Recalling that Green did look somewhat ill at a [[press conference]] that was [[broadcast]] last [[week]], Steve observes that he kept adjusting his very ill-fitted [[suit]], and taking [[drink]]s of [[water]]. At the time Steve only assumed that he was nervous for some reason, but believes that he did seem somewhat peculiar now that Mickey mentions it. Steve says that he will scan some [[news site]]s for more, and asks what he call the site owner now that [[Clive Finch|Clive]] is gone.
|-
! 17
| [[key c]]
| key c says that Green is a rare politician in that he's got [[guts]].
|-
! 18
| [[Lorinda]]
| Lorinda addresses the site, saying that these people are always trying to stir up [[trouble]]. It is obvious that it is just a strange [[camera]] [[angle]], in the same way that all of the other [[conspiracy theory|conspiracy theories]] from ''Doctor Who?'' are clearly [[forgery|forged]]. Lorinda does not believe that "this Rose girl" ever existed.
|-
! 19
| [[Hopeless]]
| Hopeless thinks that the Doctor is merely a [[smokescreen]] to distract from the [[truth]], though what that is is anyone's guess.
|-
! 20
| [[Jamie (Rose sighting confirmed)|Jamie]]
| Jamie thinks that there is no Doctor and the [[US government]] is using Green's condition as a [[distraction]] from their [[goal]] of [[global domination]] in an attempt to publicise [[mental health]].
|-
! 21
| [[Harri (Rose sighting confirmed)|Harri]]
| Harri believes in the Doctor but does not think that Green is fat because of him.
|-
! 12
| [[Government Offical]]
| Government Offical orders ''Doctor Who?'' to cease, insisting that "THE GOVERNMENT IS NOT CORRUPT. DO NOT CONTINUE. This is your first [[warning]]."
|-
! 13
| [[Graham (Rose sighting confirmed]]
| Green told Graham that it's [[glandular]]. Graham asks what's up with people, don't they believe their local MPs any more.
|-
! 14
| [[Dave Pashby]].
| Dave says that Green is just another [[fat cat]].
|-
! 15
| [[Dorothy (Rose sighting confirmed)|Dorothy]]
| Dorothy suggests that there's a lot of [[Spirit (alcohol)|Spirits]] in Green's body, all over 40 proof.
|-
! 16
| [[Access]]
| Access says that he has no idea who Green is and that it's just mean ":P".
|-
! 17
| [[Michael H.]]
| """This [[breakfast]] is [[Atkins diet|Atkins]], apart from that [[bread]], that [[bagel]], those [[bean]]s, those [[Weetabix]]es, that [[toast]], that [[marmalade]]..."
|-
! 18
| [[Phil Arnold]]
| Phil says that it has to be aliens.
|-
! 19
| [[Dr P Ware]]
| Dr P Ware says that it is "noting sinister", just [[wind]].
|-
! 20
| [[Nu Wong]]
| Nu Wong says that Green is feeding off the [[Tony Blair|Prime Minister]]'s [[lifeforce]].
|-
! 21
| [[Mr Deacy]]
| Mr Deacy says that ''Doctor Who?'' are all conspiracy [[loony|loonies]] and really should get out more and grow up, that Mr Green is doing a very good job indeed and could well do without this kind of [[nonsense]]. He says that they'll be saying next that he is really an alien.
|-
! 22
| [[Ben Swithen]]
| Ben from [[Yorkshire]] says there they were recently warned of a worldwide [[banana]] [[shortage]] due to "un[[season]]al [[weather]] conditions". He suggests that the government have been warned and are stocking their [[stomach]]s up while [[food]] still lasts. He adds that people have a right to know.
|-
! 23
| [[Craig O.]]
| Craig suggests that Green ate his nearest [[rival]] in the [[poll]]s.
|-
! 24
| [[a friend]]
| a friend suggests that it may not be just Green's [[spirit]] in his [[body]].
|-
! 25
| [[Laurence (Rose sighting confirmed)|Laurence]]
| Laurence claims to have [[x-ray]]ed Mr Green a while back and discovered that he had a [[parasite]] growing within him, which Laurence believes must be related to the Doctor. Saying that he must be quick, Laurence knows that by submitting this information the government will make him disappear, but that he has nothing to live for since the [[Auton|dummies]] killed [[Laurence's family|his family]].
|-
! 26
| [[PDT]]
| PDT has a [[PDT's friend|friend]] whose [[PDT's friend's brother|brother's]] [[PDT's friend's brother's fiancee|fiancee]] works for the [[canteen]] at Westminster, reporting that Mr Green was the one who ate all the pies.
|-
! 27
| [[Andy Fawcettt]]
| With a [[lol]], Andy says that he thought it was obvious that all the MPs are full of hot air as there is an [[election]] coming up.
|}
|}


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