The Ballad of the Last Chance Saloon

"The Ballad of the Last Chance Saloon" was a song sung by Steven Taylor and accompanied by Dodo Chaplet on the piano. They were forced to perform at gunpoint in the Last Chance Saloon in Tombstone, Arizona when they were mistaken for companions of Doc Holliday. Their "hijackers" became suspicious when Dodo mentioned "the Doctor", and they noticed Steven was wearing guns. They wanted to satisfy themselves that Steven and Dodo were indeed "thespians" as they claimed and used the song as a test of their performance skills. (TV: The Gunfighters)

Behind the scenes

• The ballad was an original song specially composed for the 1966 serial, The Gunfighters. As performed by Lynda Baron, the song also provided "Greek chorus"-like narration for the story. It had about twenty verses, although some were reprises in varying tempos and orchestrations. There would not be another original song commissioned for Doctor Who until the rap song featured in 1988's The Greatest Show in the Galaxy.

Lyrics

So fill up your glasses,

And join in the song.

The law’s right behind you,

And it won’t take long.

So come, you coyotes

And howl at the moon,

Till there’s blood upon the sawdust,

In The Last Chance Saloon.

On your way then you cowboys,

The time will be soon,

When there's blood upon the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

It's your last chance of cussing

At a gunfighter's doom,

It's your last chance of nothin'

At the Last Chance Saloon!

Till there's blood on the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

With rings on their fingers

And bells on their toes

The girls come to Tombstone

In their high silk hose.

They'll dance on the tables

Or sing you a tune,

For whatever's in your wallet

At the Last Chance Saloon.

On your way then, you lawmen,

The time will be soon,

When there's blood upon the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

It's your last chance of boozing,

Where there's no-one to mind.

It's your last chance of losing

And the first place you'll find.

When there's blood upon the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

When there's blood upon the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon!

You've a good chance of dyin',

It's your last chance to hide.

There won't be no flyin'

Till your last, long ride.

There's gamblers from Denver,

There's guns from the South,

And many a Cowboy

With a dry dry mouth.

There's a ragtime piana'

And a small back room,

For to sleep off your troubles

In the Last Chance Saloon.

With rings on their fingers

And bells on their toes,

The girls come to Tombstone

In their high silk hose.

You've a good chance of dying,

It's your last chance to hide;

There won't be no flyin'

'Til your last, long ride.

You've a good chance of swingin',

It's your last chance to hide.

And your last chance at singin'

Till your last long ride.

So pick him up gentle

And carry him slow,

He's gone kind of mental

Under Earp's heavy blow.

It's your last chance of boozing

Where there's no-one to mind,

It's your last chance of losing

And the first place you find.

It's your last chance of earning

Your gunfighters fee.

The pay is in dollars,

But the bullets are free.

It's your last chance of cussing

At a gunfighters doom.

It's your last chance of nothin'

It's the Last Chance Saloon.

So it's curtains for Charlie,

That barman of fame.

He met Johnny Ringo

And he knew Johnny's name.

He knew Johnny's name

And he spoke it out loud.

Now Charlie the barman

Has gotten a shroud.

He knew Johnny's name

And he spoke it out loud.

Now Charlie the barman

Has gotten a shroud.

Johnny Ringo has found her.

Johnny Ringo's found Kate.

The gunslinger's got her,

Now what is her fate?

Johnny Ringo has seen her,

She's coming his way.

Johnny Ringo and Katie

Were lovers, they say.

It's curtains for Warren,

They've gunned the kid down.

And them bad, cruel outlaws

Are heading for town.

On your way then you cowboys

The time will be soon

When there's blood on the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

He knew Johnny's name

And he spoke it out loud.

Now Charlie the barman

Has gotten a shroud.

It's curtains for Warren,

They've gunned the kid down.

And them bad, cruel outlaws

Are heading for town.

On your way then you cowboys,

The time will be soon

When there's blood on the sawdust

In the Last Chance Saloon.

So the Earps and the Clantons

Are aimin' to meet,

At the OK Corral

Near Calamity Street.

It's the OK Corral

Boys of gun fighting fame,

Where the Earps and the Clantons,

They played out the game.

They played out the game

And we nevermore shall

Hear a story the like

Of the OK Corral.

So the cards, they are drawn

An' the chips, they are down,

Them outlaws and lawmen

Are headin' for town.

And the Earps and the Clantons

Are aimin' to meet

At the OK Corral

Near Calamity Street.

So them bad, cruel outlaws

Are meeting up soon.

And they've drunk their last drink

In the Last-Chance Saloon.

It's the OK Corral

Boys of gun fighting fame,

Where the Earps and the Clantons,

They played out their game.

They paid their sins

And they lost on the draw.

For the Earps they was faster

And they was the law.

So beware all you cowboys

Who's yearning to sin.

If the Earps is the lawmen

You ain't gonna win.