Cuckoo (audio story)

Vijay and Diane, urban explorers who host the Xplore Xtreme channel, meet up with their old friend Bryn in Cardiff and follow a 19th century sewer network he discovered at work to the Hub. There, they hear strange noises and meet Bilis in the morgue, collecting Torchwood artefacts including a soul-absorbing corpse flask, a singularity scalpel and a tranquilliser gun that he gives to Diane. The exit is locked and, whilst Diane investigates a white figure, Bilis gives Vijay and Bryn the base's blueprints for a price that they do not question.

Bryn takes the lift to Roald Dahl Plass, but the ceiling does not open and he is crushed to death as the distressed Vijay films it. An emergency program activates and a hologram in the form of Ianto appears to Vijay, apparently unseen by Bilis, and recruits into Torchwood by telling him that he is special and needed. Ianto tasks him with ensuring that Bilis does not take any objects from the Hub and fades away to conserve power, continuing to observe Vijay through his camera as he searches the base and locates Diane.

Looking through Diane's bag, Vijay finds the gun that Bilis gave her as well as a shard drive, one of several that somebody has been blackmailing her into retrieving from the sites that the pair of them have visited. Diane shoots him rather than hand the drive over, but she regrets her act and tries to carry him to safety as the Weevils approach despite Bilis offering to protect them in return for the drive. She is killed and, when he comes around, Vijay is told by Bilis how he intends to destroy the artefacts that he has collected to prevent Torchwood, which he sees as an aberration, from saving Earth. In the true timeline, Vijay, Diane and Bryn were to join Torchwood and use the Rift Manipulator.

Bilis forcibly removes one of Vijay's eyes and uses it in conjunction with an alien artefact to see Ianto, whom he cannot hear but whose lips he can read. He inverts the Rift Manipulator and, before disappearing, gives what he claims is a survival shroud to Vijay to use to save himself or the Torchwood equipment from the Rift scar energy. Ianto insists that he save the equipment and confirms that he locked the Hub in order to use him to get rid of Bilis, threatening to keep him in until he dies should he use the shroud to save himself. Vijay covers the equipment to become a hero, but Ianto's scan reveals that the shroud is a fake and the burst of Rift energy is released, killing Vijay.

The reality streams are untangled following the activation of the Rift Manipulator and Vijay wakes up, having had a terrible dream. Directed by the hologram of Ianto, Vijay, Diane and Bryn have work to do as an energy spike is detected at Cardiff Castle and requires Torchwood's urgent attention.

Cast[[edit] | [edit source]]

Worldbuilding[[edit] | [edit source]]

Vijay and Diana went to Pitlochry.
Vijay and Diana host Xplore Xtreme. It has 96,135 subscribers.
Vijay mentions Cardiff Unknown.
Vijay has broken up with Jake.
Vijay started a knitting society after breaking up with Damien and became a chef when he broke up with Jesse.
Bilis collects a corpse flask which absorbs souls and will stop a Gelth invasion, a transmitter which will silence the Chimes of Death and a singularity scalpel.
Diane is an army reserve.
Vijay was born on 14 May, 1990 and is an only child.
Vijay studied at the University of Bristol.
Vijay is an admin assistant at Lusters and Sons.
Vijay broke his left leg when he was twelve.
Vijay spends 20% of his time online watching porn.
Vijay once dyed his hair blue.
Diane has been being blackmailed by somebody who hacked into her Hello Friend account and accessed her DMs.
Bilis believes the Weevils hid themselves away from a deity.
Bilis mentions Torchwood’s leader being a fixed point in time.
Bilis list recent Torchwood personnel including “a herald”, “a woman from the wrong universe” and a “man resurrected from the dead”.
In the intended timeline, Diane is tactical officer, Bryn is civil liaison and Vijay is leader.
Bilis wins a Pyrrhic victory.

Notes[[edit] | [edit source]]

Textless cover

This story is a posthumous release for Murray Melvin who died two months earlier, this making it one of his last performances as the character.

Continuity[[edit] | [edit source]]

Bryn mentions Roger Pugh who used to be boss of planning at Cardiff council. (AUDIO: More Than This)
Vijay has visited an old UNIT bunker in Hereford. (AUDIO: Dissected)
Vijay brings up Meredith Pope and the ScrapeJane route. (AUDIO: ScrapeJane)
Bilis notes the last personnel used the lift to escape the Hub. (AUDIO: Thoughts and Prayers)
The hologram of Ianto says that Torchwood is more than any one person. Ng previously said that Torchwood was more than Jack. (AUDIO: Aliens Next Door)
Vijay notes Cardiff has recently experienced a flood, (AUDIO: Eye of the Storm) a drought, (AUDIO: Day Zero) and fire balls falling from the sky. (AUDIO: Thoughts and Prayers)
Ianto says that most operatives die for Torchwood. (TV: Doomsday, Exit Wounds, etc.)
Ianto died heartbroken. (TV: Children of Earth: Day Four)
Bilis previously was involved in creating alternate timelines. (PROSE: The Twilight Streets)

External links[[edit] | [edit source]]

Official Cuckoo page at bigfinish.com