User:Quark16/Reviews: Difference between revisions

so they walk home and in the streets they meet a woman who looks excactly like the stoned girl at the start .Wait a minute it is her . Though she doesnt look that stomed . Maybye just a little bit . Francis and Alan are both in love with her .(Odd Taste) , Francis makes a stupid speech like "Who ever she chooses between the both of us let us remain freiends !" When he is so obviously thinking up a scheme that involves a knife and Alan . Nah HE doesnt stab him but another guy  does . Well if it isnt ceseare the sleepwalking man . how convenent . he can stab Alan then say that he was sleepwalking and it was an acident ... Way to go Ceseare . So he walks round the street doing whats seems to be ballet moves and .. Rubbing himself off the wall . Ceseare thats just embarassing . So Alan is found died in the morning . Did I just say he was found died ? He was found DEAD ! So bohho people cry . Francis trys to go to the police but there dickheads and wont listen so .. Off he goes to the stoned girls house  . Where her dad is the chief of police . How conventant is that ? So the police listen know and pace back and forth . yeah thats help people . Tell me .. Will it bring alan !?#! .So the chief is killed aswell and stoned girl is like "How Dramatactally conventant " . Maybye we should just call the chief of police "The Man Of Covenience". They should a movie/Spin off about him and call it well .. "A MAN OF OF COVENINCE " . ePISODE ONE . The Phantom Menance !So it isnt long before That Familar man in Black comes to kill stoned girl . So he Comes in through an .. open window . Theres a killer on the loose and you .. Leave the window open ! So the window is huge ! Long And huge ! Is about the size of that German Villiage at the start . So he wals over with a pink knife aand goes to stab himself . But he stops .. Please in the name of god do not fall in love with with her .. Please .. I mean Beautey and the Beast .. Phantom of the opera  .. Hunchback of notre Dame .. Man Who Laughs (I will review this one someday). .... And now this gets added to the list .That long list of romances that just didnt make it . So By god i was wright . So he does a frankenstien monster impression that goes like this "Ugh ! She pretty . Me steal!" . So out they go of the window . Across the roof And the cardboard chimney pots . that are still wet from all the black paint . cesare inhales some paints fumes .. Because people back then Painted there chimney pots ? And falls to the ground . Nah ! That doesnt happen ! He runs away with her .The police suspect santa claus man and send Francis and Some police Guy to his cabin . Which is so warped and oddly shaped its like a .. Big Warped House . so Ceseare is in the house what the ! But ceseare just kidnapped .. Does not make scence ! Its a friking Acid trip within and acid trip .. Yes its that crazy !So grown man ceseare is being spoon fed by santa . Read aloud that last sentance there . It tells you everthing you need to know about this movie .So the spoonfed Ceseare turns out to be a mannequin . A damm good one at that ! so they chase after ceseare (The Real One) and he falls off a cliff ! .. seriously thats like jack the ripper tripping over a bucket . They go to and mental asylum under the impression that caligari (Santa)

is insane .But the asylum turns out to be run by dr caligari ! WtF ! I mean i like plot twists But this is just Too much ! So Caligari is like "I am not this caligari you speak off. I do not know who this handsome man is".He is so bullshiting ! Unless hes like caligaris twin brother .. Which hes not . This is sooooooo confusing . They show him ceseare dead body and he crys . francis is like "what a twat ".So he confesses to being caligari and we get a flashback of caligari going mad (His Discent into madness).Which is basically him running round acting like a complete maniac while the word "Caligari" flashes aaround the scrren like 103 time at 103 different angles.Couldnt they of done more to show a descent into madness then have a word flash arounfd the scrren . I mean a flashback would of been nice :( I mean how did he get Ceseare and stuff . seems alot could of been done . But hasnt been . We get some little information that caligari is not infact the first crazed doctor to go by that name and infact he is the latest in a long line of fakers trying to replicate the original Caligari who also had a sleepwalking Servant.Caligari is put in prison or somthing like that. That would the perfect ending but no the film started with a prolouge so it has to finish one. so the flashbox stops and where back with the young guy (Francis) and the wacky old man . The old doesnt bilieve him . So Francis takes him to an asylum.This small segmant at the end ruins the film as it controdicts one big thing. at the asylum we see drugged up wife to be .. I think shes arranging flowers .. i forget . shes not my favourite character in this fim ! Maybye my least (Shes Boring). Ummm so in the asylum we come across the biggest muck up in film history .... At the asylum we see .. CESEARE! .. But he died .. fell off a cliff .. we saw his body ! aww forget it I have lost faith in this movie Since this crappy aslum scene started . So the movie even cant end it on tis .  THey decide to suprise you once more ! With a yet another no sense seen .. Oh goody . In the asylum they meet .. a man .. old man .. top hat.. looks like santa ! Apparantly HE is sane and is a doctor of the asylum and .. Francis s the insane one ! . This whole flashback with the giant hill was just a mad fantasy dreamt up by madman Francis . Suddenly this makes more sence. Ceseare wasnt actually the sleepwalking servant to a delunsional gay old man with a fetish for huge top hats.So the movie ends there at a cliffhanger wow ! Is there a sequel ? No but this silent film was remade in 2006 ! Its quite good ! So overall the film didnt make sence but then did ! If that makes sence about me talking about sence saying that sence but then did make perfect sence . That makes sence !So 8/10 for me . This review was rushed at the end so quality isnt as good as the start was . Still rushing . Does this movie sound good ? Say on the ducussion page if you want ! please watch these few clips of the film below ! If you can !