The Husbands of River Song (TV story)

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The Husbands of River Song was the 2015 Doctor Who Christmas special. It was the show's eleventh Christmas special since its revival, and the second full Christmas special with Peter Capaldi as the Twelfth Doctor. It saw Alex Kingston return to reprise the role of River Song once more.

It was noteworthy for closing the book on River Song's timeline that began with her debut, at last showing her and the Doctor go to Darillium. It also showed the Twelfth Doctor's first and only encounter and interactions with River, as this would turn out to be the final time the Doctor ever saw her. For River, this was the final adventure before she met her demise in the two-part television story Silence in the Library / Forest of the Dead, as the Doctor turning up on River's doorstep with a new haircut and a suit, her night on Darillium to see the Singing Towers sing, and the Doctor giving River his sonic screwdriver, all of which had been previously mentioned by River in that story, are realised in this special.

Synopsis

The Doctor is on the planet Mendorax Dellora in 5343, where he is asked by a man named Nardole to follow him, thinking he is a surgeon, on the orders of River Song. A surgeon is required to remove a diamond from the head of King Hydroflax after his maligned attempt to steal it, and River seeks to recover it. Surprised that River cannot identify his newest face, the Doctor struggles to break the news to her while learning how she acts on her own- and how many other lovers she has had. However, both he and River soon find that the time is drawing close for the last page in the diary of their journeys together to be written...

Plot

On Christmas Day 5343 on the human colony of Mendorax Dellora, the Doctor is mistaken by a servant, Nardole, for a surgeon appointed byRiver Song to attend to her dying husband, King Hydroflax. River Song, who has not yet met the Doctor's present incarnation, fails to recognise him and increasingly frustrates him with her flirtations with Hydroflax. River takes the Doctor aside to discuss the operation he is supposed to be performing; the Halassi Androvar, the most valuable diamond in the universe, has become lodged in Hydroflax’s brain during a raid on the Halassi vaults and is slowly killing him. River wants 'the surgeon' to remove his entire head, considering it quicker and easier.

They are interrupted by Hydroflax who has listened to their conversation. He detaches his head from his mechanical body and orders it to kill them. While River defends herself the Doctor grabs Hydroflax's head and threatens to put him in the garbage disposal, creating a stalemate and allowing Ramone, River's actual husband, to teleport her, the Doctor and Hydroflax’s head outside of the ship. Believing Nardole to have information about River, Hydroflax’s body decapitates him to use his head as its own.

Although the Doctor is convinced that River knows who he is, she denies it. She reveals she purposely crashed Hydroflax’s ship in their location knowing the Doctor would be in the area with a TARDIS. Being unfamiliar with his new set of regenerations she has an incomplete set of his faces and Ramone has only been able to find the TARDIS, not its owner; River decides they will just have to borrow it instead. However the TARDIS's safeguards prevent it from taking off when it detects that Hydroflax’s head and body are respectively inside and outside the TARDIS.

Hearing Nardole calling for help, Ramone is tricked and uploaded into Hydroflax’s body as well. Hydroflax’s head allows his body to locate the TARDIS, and using Ramone forces its way inside. With Hydroflax’s head and body now both in the TARDIS it is able to travel to the starship Harmony and Redemption, where River requests that the Maître d’, Flemming, deadlock seal the baggage hold in order to prevent Hydroflax’s body from pursuing them further.

Rather than return the diamond to the Halassi, River reveals that she intends to sell the diamond to a buyer named Scratch, who has secretly filled the meeting point with members of his own species. After receiving payment, River and the Doctor discover that Scratch and his compatriots worship King Hydroflax and are after the diamond in his honour. Despite attempts to hide the bagged head containing the diamond, they are stopped from escaping by Flemming, who was tricked into entering the baggage area by an under-duress Ramone. Flemming has promised Hydroflax’s body an even greater head, the head of the Doctor, and believes that River Song will be the perfect bait to get it.

Sensing that Hydroflax's head is beyond recovery and will die imminently, Hydroflax's body destroys it, leaving only the diamond. River is asked for the whereabouts of the Doctor, but she explains that although she loves the Doctor they are mistaken in thinking that he loves her enough to find himself with her, as she believes the Doctor to be incapable of falling in love. Seeing the steady gaze and mild smirk on the Doctor's face, River realizes he's been with her all along and the Doctor confirms this by saying, "Hello, sweetie."

Being a time traveller, River is aware that the ship is about to be crippled by a meteor strike, which she uses as their escape plan, taking the diamond in the process. The Doctor uses Scratch’s universal bank transfer device to overload Hydroflax’s body, before heading to the ship’s bridge. While the ship is crashing, River realises that they are heading towards the planet Darillium - home to the Singing Towers mentioned by the future River as the place where she spent her final night with the Doctor ("Forest of the Dead"). Realising that they’re unable to save the ship, they flee back into the TARDIS, but the impact of the crash knocks River unconscious.

After avoiding taking River to Darillium for as long as possible to avoid their last date together mentioned by her future self, the Doctor decides to give in to the inevitable. After travelling to the next morning, the Doctor suggests to a man searching for survivors of the crash that he build a restaurant where they're standing, with a view of the Singing Towers, and gives him the diamond to fund its construction. Travelling forwards in time once again, the Doctor books the table on the balcony for Christmas Day in four years’ time. When River awakes she is told that the Doctor is waiting for her at their table. Hydroflax’s body, now peacefully controlled by the heads of Ramone and Nardole, was pulled from the wreckage and put to work as a waiter in the restaurant.

The Doctor gives River a present; the sonic screwdriver she will use in the library. As the pair admire the Singing Towers, River asks whether the stories that this will be their final night together are true, to which the Doctor only responds by saying, "Spoilers". The Doctor insists there's no way to avoid the end of their times together and refuses to tell River the future, but informs her that one night on Darillium lasts for twenty-four years, giving them a long last date. As the two smile at each other, the words "And they both lived happily ever after" are displayed on-screen.

Cast

Uncredited Cast

Crew

to be added

References

The Doctor

River Song

  • River Song claims she had at least two wives.
  • River states that the Doctor has planned to take her to Darillium numerous times but has always cancelled at the last minute.
  • River Song owns the book History's Finest Exploding Restaurants with the tagline "The Best Food for Free, Skip the Coffee". She used it as a source when plotting her escape from the meteor strike that hit the Harmony and Redemption.
  • River is now 200 years old, revealing she has an augmented lifespan- whether she is referring to the lifespan of a Time Lord or an artificially extended lifespan is unknown.
  • River has a unique perfume spray that lets her change her clothes as she pleases.

The TARDIS

  • The roundels are once again used for storage purposes. In this instance, River has hidden alcohol inside a cupboard behind one of them, to the Doctor's surprise.
  • The TARDIS is able to produce a pair of hologrammatic antlers for the Doctor.
  • River indicates she often steals the TARDIS and returns it before the Doctor notices.
  • River says "It's not as... snug as it looks." For once, the Doctor is the one who says "It's bigger on the inside." He comments that he's always wanted to hear it done right.
  • When someone is both inside and outside the TARDIS at the same time, it can't take off.

Sonic equipment

Darillium

  • According to River's research, Darillium was rumoured to be the last planet that she and the Doctor would visit together. The Doctor refuses to confirm this.
  • A night on Darillium lasts for 24 Earth years.
  • The Singing Towers "sing" due to the flowing of wind through the numerous cave structures in the towers which harmonises with the crystal layer.

Mendorax Dellora

Story notes

  • This is the first episode of Doctor Who since the 2012 Series 7 episode TV: The Angels Take Manhattan, and the first starring Peter Capaldi, to not feature Jenna Coleman as Clara Oswald.
  • Gary Russell previously attempted to have the Twelfth Doctor and River meet in his novel Big Bang Generation, but as Steven Moffat set up The Husbands of River Song to be the Twelfth Doctor's first, last and only meeting with River, Russell chose to replace River with Bernice Summerfield in the story.
  • This is the first Christmas episode to have no scenes take place on Earth.
  • This is the first time in a main story that Alex Kingston's name has appeared in the opening titles.
  • When River's sonic screwdriver is revealed as her present, an excerpt of the Series 4 soundtrack "Silence In The Library" is heard, foreshadowing events the events to come in River's last adventure.
  • As Mels, River used the phrase "penny in the air" whenever someone was oblivious to something important, following up with "and the penny drops" when they finally figured it out, seen in TV: Let's Kill Hitler. Ironically, River is guilty of becoming the butt of her own joke for being oblivious to the fact that the Doctor is right in front of her until he points it out.
  • This is the first time outside of mini-episodes that River has been in a story not to feature one of the Doctor's companions alongside her and the Doctor.
  • The little town set used for Mendorax Dellora appears to have been repurposed from the trap street set used in TV: Face the Raven.
  • A variation of The Doctor's Theme is played when River and Ramone discuss the Damsel in distress.
  • No cast details accompanied the programme listing in Radio Times, which had the synopsis "When a crashed spaceship calls upon his help, the Time Lord finds himself launched on a chase across the galaxy. Greg Davies and Matt Lucas guest-star." However, the listing for the repeat on Boxing Day (26th December) includes a cast list.

Production errors

  • When King Hydroflax's talking head is resting on the console's telepathic panel, the panel is bending inward, evidently made from a soft material rather than the sturdy materials that a TARDIS console would be made with. When his head is removed, the TARDIS console is fine again. This is most likely due to the production staff having replaced the panel with a fake one, which would accommodate Greg Davies' head with comfort.

Ratings

to be added

Continuity

Footnotes