Doctor Who? running joke

Many references to the Doctor's apparent lack of a name have appeared in the Doctor Who universe, playing on the 'Doctor Who?' joke. This is an ongoing attempt to document these instances.

See separate article for a discussion of the Doctor's true name from an in-universe perspective.

Television

Doctor Who

First Doctor

The first occurred in the second episode of the first Doctor Who story, An Unearthly Child, when Ian Chesterton said, "Well just open the doors, Doctor Foreman." The Doctor replied, "Eh, Doctor who? — what's he talking about?" According to the DVD production subtitles, the response was actually added by William Hartnell himself.
In the same episode, Barbara also referred to the Doctor as "Doctor Foreman", to which Ian replied, "That's not his name. Who is he? Doctor who? Perhaps if we knew his name we might have a clue to all this."
In The Keys of Marinus, when Ian was a suspect for murder, he was told to find someone to speak for him at the tribunal. He said he knew someone in the city, and when asked, "Who is he?" he replied, "Who?", smiled, and continued, "He's a Doctor."
In the final episode of DW: The Chase, the Doctor attempted to pass himself off to a group of Daleks as the (now-destroyed) robot duplicate of himself. It didn't work, and after escaping the Doctor said, "They now know who's Who." According to the DVD production notes the script capitalises the second "Who" as an in-joke. (The production notes also indicate that Terry Nation's original script for the story had no less than two lines of dialogue that would have directly referred to the Doctor by the name Doctor Who.)
At the beginning of The Time Meddler, Vicki said (referring to Ian and Barbara, who had just left), "I shall miss them, Doctor," to which the Doctor replied, "Who?"
In The Gunfighters, the Doctor hesitantly introduced himself to Bat Masterson by the alias of Doctor Caligari. Masterson asked, "Doctor Who?" and the Doctor answered, "Yes, er, quite right."
In The War Machines, WOTAN ordered Dodo Chaplet to send the Doctor with the command, "DDDOCTORR WHOO ISS RREQUIREDD". Later in the serial, some of the scientists used the name "Dr. Who" to refer to the Doctor as well. This is the only time in the series that the Doctor was directly called Doctor Who. This reportedly caused fans to send angry mail to the production team.

Second Doctor

The Doctor introduced himself as "Doktor von Wer" (German for "Doctor (of) Who") to which the sergeant said, "Doctor who?". The Doctor then responded, "That's what I said." (DW: The Highlanders)
When the Doctor wrote a note to Professor Zaroff, he signed it "Dr. W." (DW: The Underwater Menace)
A moment after meeting the Doctor for the first time, Colonel Crichton asked, "Who was that strange little man?". An UNIT employee answered, "The Doctor". Crichton replied, "Who?", followed by an immediate cut to The Brigadier, in the middle of an unrelated conversation with the Doctor, saying "Yes". The three lines, played rapid fire as they are, tip the hat to both the in-joke and the Abbot and Costello "Who's on First" sketch. (DW: The Five Doctors)

Third Doctor

In The Curse of Peladon, the Earth representative was outraged that the guards wouldn't let her in the palace, because she was the rightful representative of Earth, The Doctor claimed to be the representative of Earth. The Earth representative then asked, "Doctor? What Doctor? Doctor who?"
In The Mutants, the Investigator asked Cotton, "Doctor... who, did you say?"
The Doctor's vehicle, Bessie, carried the licence plate "WHO 1". (However, the vehicle introduced later in Pertwee's era, while referred to as the Whomobile in publicity and by Pertwee himself, is never referred to by this name on screen.)

Fourth Doctor

Continuing the in-joke from the Third Doctor era, the Fourth Doctor drove Bessie with its WHO 1 licence plate on one occasion. (DW: Robot)
During her initial meeting with the Doctor, Tegan referred to him as "Doctor whoever-you-are". (DW: Logopolis)

Fifth Doctor

When Lady Cranleigh was introduced to the Doctor, she said, "How do you do? Doctor... who?" (DW: Black Orchid)

Sixth Doctor

When Russell finds the Doctor and Peri in the London sewers, he demands their names, leading to the exchange: ‘Shall it suffice to say that this is Peri and I am known as the Doctor?’‘Doctor who?’‘Actually, it’s more a matter of what. I’m a doctor of medicine, science, philosophy –’ (DWN: Attack of the Cybermen)

Seventh Doctor

A serious toned version was used as Lady Peinforte asked Ace, "Doctor Who? Have you never wondered where he came from? Who he is?" in an attempt at blackmailing the Doctor into surrendering his component of Nemesis. (DW: Silver Nemesis)
The joke turned metafictional in Battlefield when the Doctor drove Bessie once again, but the licence plate had been inexplicably updated to "WHO 7".

Ninth Doctor

Rose's online search for information about the Doctor brought her to a website titled "Who is Doctor Who?"
In The Empty Child, when Rose introduced the Doctor to Jack as "Mr. Spock" she said to him; "What was I supposed to say, you don't have a name! Don't you ever get tired of 'Doctor'? Doctor who?"
- According to Steven Moffat a more explicit use of the joke was planned but cut. The Doctor was to have responded to Rose's bestowal of the name Mr. Spock by saying "I'd rather Doctor Who than Star Trek."
When meeting Margaret Blaine's (Blon Fel-Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen in disguise) secretary Idris Hopper in Boom Town this discussion occurred:

The Doctor: "Just go in there, and tell her the Doctor would like to see her."

Idris: "Doctor who?"

The Doctor: "Just the Doctor. Tell her exactly that. The Doctor."

Tenth Doctor

In The Christmas Invasion, the newly regenerated Tenth Doctor fainted in front of Jackie Tyler and Mickey Smith after landing his TARDIS after Rose told the pair that was the Doctor, Jackie thought of the Ninth Doctor and not knowing the concept of regeneration, asked Rose, "What d'you mean, 'That's the Doctor'? Doctor who?"
In The Girl in the Fireplace, after The Doctor and Reinette read each others minds, Reinette said sadly, "Doctor who? It's more than just a secret", before inviting him to the dance.
In Blink, Sally Sparrow and Larry Nightingale watched an Easter Egg on a DVD. Sally said, "The Doctor." and Larry replied, "Who's the Doctor?".
In The Next Doctor, the Doctor introduced himself to Rosita as "The Doctor" and she replied "Doctor who?".

Eleventh Doctor

In The Impossible Astronaut, Charles II burst into a room and asked Matilda, "Where's the Doctor?" She replied, "Doctor who?"
In The Impossible Astronaut, Canton Delaware asked Amy about the Doctor, saying, "Doctor who, exactly?"
In Let's Kill Hitler, when the Teselecta attacked Melody Pond for killing the Doctor, the Doctor emerged from the TARDIS with a different outfit, saying "Sorry, did you say she killed the Doctor? The Doctor? Doctor Who?"
Alfie Owens first words were "Doctor Who".
In The Wedding of River Song, Dorium claimed that "Doctor Who?" was a question that should never be answered. Dorium said that the Silence believed that when the question was asked, "silence must fall".

The Sarah Jane Adventures

In Revenge of the Slitheen, the Slitheen told Sarah Jane that members of their family died in Downing Street. Sarah Jane tried to tell them that she might know "What happened. Or rather, who happened."

K9 and Company

When Brendan Richards asked, "Who is the Doctor?", K9 Mark III responded "Affirmative."

Audio

Big Finish Productions

Fifth Doctor

In BFA: The Kingmaker, the publishing robot that comes to interrogate The Doctor about his failure to produce his final in a series of children's books entitled Doctor Who Discovers, refers to him as 'Doctor Who'. When this is questioned by Peri and Erimem, the Doctor explains that "some idiot" at the publishing company had misprinted the title, which was originally intended to be The Doctor, Who Discovers...

Sixth Doctor

In BFA: Real Time, the President suggests contacting "the Doctor." His subordinate, Dean, responds, "who?" (This scene is exclusive to the story's audio release, and does not appear in the webcast version.)
The summary for BFA: Pier Pressure, written from the point of view of Max Miller, features the line "No, this bloke called himself the Doctor. Doctor who, you ask?"

Doctor Who Unbound

In BFDWU: Sympathy for the Devil, the Doctor mentions that to the Chinese he is known as "Hu" ("the Tiger," for his courage), "Hu" ("the Fox," for his cunning), and "Xue" ("the Doctor," he who tends to the sick). The last is his personal favourite. All three names are pronounced much like the word "who."

Prose

Novels

Virgin New Adventures

Second Doctor

In MA: The Dark Path, after the Second Doctor introduces his companions and himself: 'this is Victoria, Jamie, and I'm the Doctor'. Adjudicator Secular Brandauer asks: 'Doctor who?' (to which the Doctor replies: 'Oh, don’t you mean Doctor whom? I do hate to be contrary, but...' and changes the subject).

Fourth Doctor

In MA : Evolution, Breckinridge addresses the Doctor as "Dr. Smith," to which Abercrombie asks: "Doctor who?"
In MA: A Device of Death, when the amnesiac Fourth Doctor is reminded of his title and he says: "That's right; I'm the Doctor', he is asked: 'Dr who?', to which he replies: 'Who? Who, who, who. Possibly, possibly...'
In MA: System Shock, during a conversation with a computer the Doctor types in the question: 'You know Who I am?' (with a capital 'W').

Past Doctor Adventures

First Doctor

In PDA: Salvation, General Marchant at one point addresses the First Doctor as 'Doctor Whoever-You-Are'.

Others

Special note should be given to the novelisation Doctor Who and the Zarbi for rendering any opportunities for the joke moot by referring to the Doctor throughout by the name "Dr. Who". This stands as the only official novel ever published to break the naming convention.

Short stories

Short Trips

First Doctor

In ST: 64 Carlysle Street, Sergeant Dunston refers to the First Doctor as 'this Doctor Whoever-he-was'.

Fifth Doctor

In ST: A Town Called Eternity, the Fifth Doctor introduces himself to Sarah Brown, who asks "Doctor who?"

Seventh Doctor

In ST: Log 384, the Seventh Doctor starts to introduce himself to Edward Grainger, pauses, and says, "Let's go with Professor, shall we?" to which Edward asks "Professor who?"

Unspecified Doctor

In ST: The Feast of Seven... Eight (and Nine), two (unspecified) incarnations of the Doctor ask each other knock-knock jokes, but they fall flat: 'Doctor.' 'Doctor who? Who's that?'

Virgin Books' Decalog

Third Doctor

In VD: Prisoners of the Sun, Liz scribbles "Doctor – who?" in her diary, under a page headed "unfinished business".

Comic strips

Doctor Who Magazine

Fourth Doctor

In DWM: Black Destiny, the Fourth Doctor and his companions are mistaken for members of the World Health Organisation, or W.H.O.

TV Comic

Fourth Doctor

In TVC: Hubert's Folly, Sir Julian Hubert calls the Doctor "Doctor whoever-you-are".

Others

As with the Zarbi novelisation, opportunities for the joke in the pre-Doctor Who Magazine era comic strips, especially those published in the 1960s and featuring companions John and Gillian, are mooted due to the strips consistently referring to the Doctor by the name Dr. Who, including in dialogue.