The Maltese Penguin (audio story)

The Maltese Penguin
Main character(s):	Frobisher
Featuring:	Sixth Doctor
Main enemy:	Josiah W. Dogbolter
Main setting:	Unnamed planet, 82nd century
Key crew
Publisher:	Big Finish Productions
Writer:	Robert Shearman
Director:	Gary Russell
Producer:	Gary Russell and Jason Haigh-Ellery
Music:	David Darlington
Sound:	David Darlington
Cover by:	Lee Binding
Release details
Number of parts:	1
Release number:	1 (spine number 33½)
Release date:	12 July 2002
Format:	1 CD Download
Production code:	BFPDWCDSS3
ISBN:	ISBN 978-1-90365-490-3 (physical) ISBN 978-1-80240-242-1 (digital)
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The Maltese Penguin was the first Doctor Who bonus story released by Big Finish Productions. It was written by Robert Shearman and featured Colin Baker as the Sixth Doctor and Robert Jezek as Frobisher.

The story was free to any subscribers whose subscription included Neverland. Numbered 33½, it was Big Finish's first "bonus" story that was not at first released to buy (outside of being included in subscriptions). This story featured Frobisher in the lead role. It was his second audio appearance (his first was The Holy Terror); the Doctor did appear in this story but was mostly sidelined for Frobisher's story. This was also the final audio story to feature Frobisher, and the first to feature Josiah W. Dogbolter.

Publisher's summary

"My friends call me Frobisher. My enemies call me Mr. Frobisher. And the junk mail department of the Galactic Readers' Digest call me Mrs. F R Rubbisher — but that's neither here nor there."

It was just another quiet day on the mean streets for Frobisher, private eye. But then a dame walks into his office and into his life. A dame who is drop dead gorgeous and drop dead deadly, offering him a case he just can't refuse.

Well, he could refuse it. If he really wanted to. But he has to pay the rent.

When their paths cross, Frobisher finds himself involved in a web of mayhem and intrigue. A web of gangland killings, corrupt cops, sentient bloodstains and very rude hotel receptionists. A web of murder and deceit, treachery and fisticuffs.

That sort of web. You know. The sticky kind.

Plot

Frobisher narrates his experience as a private eye, waiting for a new case. His last was a week ago, finding a missing cat. The Doctor arrives, asking if he wants to come back after three weeks away from the TARDIS. He refuses. The Doctor leaves. A woman, Alicia Mulholland, arrives to engage his services- Frobisher continues narrating until Aleisha explains how her fiancé is cheating on her. Frobisher is shown a picture of the fiancé- he's not good looking- and then he disguises himself as a humanoid so he can find out who the fiancé is cheating with.

He disguises himself as the Doctor, then waits for the fiancé, Arthur Gringrax. They both walk through the rain until Arthur arrives at a hotel. Frobisher tries to bribe thr man who runs the hotel, but has to threaten him. He tells Frobisher Arthur is in room 323. Opening the door reveals an empty room. He goes to the bathroom and inside sees... A pool of warm blood.

The blood flinched upon being prodded. Three cops come up behind Frobisher. Elric Chandler, the head of police, arrests Frobisher. He then arrests the man in charge of the hotel, too. Frobisher realises Chandler arrived at the hotel too quickly, and then is knocked out. When he came to, he overhears a man bribing Chandler, and then Chandler leaves. The man is revealed to be Josiah W. Dogbolter, who Gringrax worked for. Josiah mentions something "distinctive" that was in Gringrax's room. He then offers Frobisher money to find the distinctive thing. A lot of money. Frobisher still refuses.

Frobisher notes that Josiah is very ugly, and looks like a frog. Elgar, Josiah's employee, takes Frobisher to the top of a cliff. He gives Frobisher 12 masoumas, which is how much money he said Alicia is paying him (minus expenses) and then pushes him over the edge. He quickly changes shape back to a penguin, and, upon exiting the water, is met by the Doctor. He extends his offer to Frobisher once more, admitting his loneliness, but Frobisher insists he can't leave in the middle of a case.

He changed back into the Doctor's body after the latter left. He walked into his office to find Alicia, and tells her that her husband is cheating with a barmaid named "Gloria". She seems surprised, and goes to leave, but then mentions Dogbolter, and how he seemed to know that his client was a woman. She admits that her interest in Arthur was purely professional, but also says she didn't kill Arthur.

They kiss. She tells him she loves him, and he tells her of his ex, Francine. Just then, Chandler comes in, threatening them with a gun. He still doesn't have the 'distinctive something' Dogbolter wanted, which is very dangerous. Alicia reveals she has the Something, and so Chandler turns the gun on Frobisher instead. Chandler says he'll use the Something to get rid of Dogbolter. Alicia convinces Chandler that there's a tracking device and bomb on him, and that Dogbolter has led him straight to Alicia.

The bomb detonates, and Chandler is dead. Just then, some of Dogbolter's men come in and take the pair to Dogbolter. Elgar, Dogbolter's henchman, takes Alicia away. Dogbolter tells Frobisher about his business plan, and how he bought all the other businesses on the planet and shut them down, leaving this planet at a standstill. The 'Something' was created by Arthur Gringrax on his lunch break. Dogbolter saw this as a threat to his profit. Elgar returns with no idea about where or what the Something is, so Dogbolter kills him.

Frobisher tells Dogbolter that the Something must be in his office, hidden by Alicia earlier. Dogbolter's henchman returns with a small package from the office, and Dogbolter says he'll destroy it. He asks Alicia to tell him what the Something is, but she refuses, and Dogbolter makes Frobisher open it. It's a computer chip. They put it in the computer, and it shows a message, sent out to all the workers: "you don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps". This helped break the hold over the workers, who are now . Dogbolter was going to leave before the economy crashed, but wants to kill them first.

Just then, the TARDIS arrives, and Dogbolter escapes. Frobisher threatens Alicia, who admits she's been using him from the start, and that there was no Arthur Gringrax- it was always her, who is really Francine, the Whifferdill who Frobisher used to be married to. She returns to her penguin body. She was the bloodstain. She knew Dogbolter would only fall for someone as honest as him. The pair kiss, now both as penguins, but Francine says she'll stay and take Dogbolter to justice while Frobisher goes back to travelling in the TARDIS.

Cast

• The Doctor - Colin Baker
• Frobisher - Robert Jezek
• Josiah W. Dogbolter - Toby Longworth
• Alicia Mulholland - Jane Goddard
• Chandler - Alistair Lock

Crew

• Cover Art - Lee Binding
• Director - Gary Russell
• Executive Producer - Jacqueline Rayner
• Music & Sound Designer - David Darlington
• Producers - Gary Russell and Jason Haigh-Ellery
• Writer - Robert Shearman

Worldbuilding

• Josiah W. Dogbolter owns the planet Metazula Beta.
• Frobisher claims to have gotten a diploma in being a Private Eye, from the Private Eye School. He only achieved a Second, and claims it would have been a First, but his teacher had a prejudice against birds.

Notes

• This story was numbered 33½ on the spine. The Big Finish website rendered this as "33 1/2" before the 2019 redesign.
  • After the 2019 redesign, the number was removed and the release was added to The Sixth Doctor Adventures.
• The case bids it "A special side-step into a 2-D universe".
• This story marks the second appearance of Frobisher in an audio play. He previously appeared in this format in the audio story The Holy Terror. As of July 2021, this is his most recent appearance in a Big Finish audio drama.
• Dogbolter mentions his art collection contains "an original Ridgway", referring to the artist who originally drew Frobisher and Dogbolter in Doctor Who Magazine.
• This audio drama was recorded on 2 November 2001 at the Moat Studios.
• With the Doctor largely absent from the story, Colin Baker gets to voice both the Doctor and Frobisher when the latter takes the Doctor's form.
• Pre-dating the Companion Chronicles series, this story is told from Frobisher's perspective.
• The title of this story is a reference to the novel The Maltese Falcon.
• When Frobisher takes on the Doctor's form, this allowed Colin Baker to voice Frobisher as well as the Doctor, although uncredited.

Continuity

• Dogbolter first appeared in COMIC: The Moderator.
• Frobisher impersonates the Sixth Doctor. He had previously done so in his first appearance, COMIC: The Shape Shifter.
• Dogbolter owns a painting by van Gogh, but, along with his other pictures, it was put up facing the wall. Dogbolter noted that they were meant to represent his wealth, rather than be decorative. The Doctor would later meet van Gogh in his eleventh incarnation. (TV: Vincent and the Doctor)

External links

• Official The Maltese Penguin page at bigfinish.com
• The Maltese Penguin at the Doctor Who Reference Guide
• DisContinuity for The Maltese Penguin at Tetrapyriarbus - The DisContinuity Guide