Iris Wildthyme
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Iris Wildthyme was a self-styled "transtemporal adventuress" of contentious origin who travelled the multiverse in an age-old double decker bus, commonly known as Celestial Omnibus. She often resembled various television and film actresses throughout her many paradoxical incarnations.
She often travelled with a diverse array of friends, perhaps most memorably her best pal Panda. (PROSE: Death of the Author [+]Loading...["Death of the Author (short story)"], Wandering Stars [+]Loading...["Wandering Stars (short story)"], AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large [+]Loading...["Wildthyme at Large (audio story)"], et al.) She once described herself as a "transtemporal righter-of-wrongs, wronger-of-rights, meddler, artist, writer, glamourpuss, occasional Time's Champion, and very old flame of the Doctor". (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"]) In her "Katy Manning" incarnation, Iris pondered as to whether she was an archetype, a siren, a witch, a harpy, a femme fatale, or even a Valkyrie from Nordic myth. (AUDIO: Iris Wildthyme Speaks...! [+]Loading...["Iris Wildthyme Speaks...! (audio story)"])
Iris did not have a stable timeline and, as such, she did not live her life in chronological order. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"]) She also kept diaries in order to keep track of certain events, such as her time on Hyspero. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme [+]Loading...["Enter Wildthyme (novel)"])
Iris was friends with many people across time and space, including the Darlington branch of MIAOW, (PROSE: The Dreadful Flap [+]Loading...["The Dreadful Flap (short story)"] et al.) the Manleigh Halt Irregulars, Señor 105, (PROSE: The Shape of Things [+]Loading...["The Shape of Things (short story)"] et al.) Vince Cosmos, (PROSE: Hang onto Yourself [+]Loading...["Hang onto Yourself (short story)"] et al.) Bernice Summerfield, (AUDIO: The Plague Herds of Excelis [+]Loading...["The Plague Herds of Excelis (audio story)"] et al.) Paul Magrs, (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"], et al.) and the Doctor. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"] et al.)
Name[[edit] | [edit source]]
In her youth in the Clockworks, she was known as Lilith, (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"]) and Iris once claimed that she had "chosen" the name Iris based off her favourite word, iridescence. (AUDIO: Iris Wildthyme Speaks...! [+]Loading...["Iris Wildthyme Speaks...! (audio story)"])
In the eighteenth century, she was given the title Lady Iris Wildthyme. (PROSE: Old Flames [+]Loading...["Old Flames (short story)"]) In her apparent final incarnation, Iris went by the name "Bianca", and it was under this name she used to deceive one of her previous incarnations and the Sixth Doctor. (AUDIO: The Wormery [+]Loading...["The Wormery (audio story)"])
In her incarnation that resembled Dame Shirley Bassey, Iris went under the alias of "Brenda Soobie". (PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen [+]Loading...["Mad Dogs and Englishmen (novel)"], [additional sources needed]) She was known to the Forge under the codename "Jezebel". (PROSE: Project: Wildthyme [+]Loading...["Project Wildthyme (short story)","Project: Wildthyme"]) The Poodles referred to Iris as "the evil one in the wonderbra and sensible shoes" (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"]) and "Ka Faraq Kweethri", which meant "the Oncoming Hangover". (PROSE: A Gamble with Wildthyme [+]Loading...["A Gamble with Wildthyme (short story)"])
Iris had a minor online presence. She used the username Route22 on an auction site, (PROSE: Buyer's Remorse [+]Loading...["Buyer's Remorse (short story)"]) and @realwildthyme on Twitter. (PROSE: Weapons Grade Snake Oil [+]Loading...["Weapons Grade Snake Oil (novel)"])
Origins[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris had multiple equally true pasts, with details that contradicted each other to varying degrees. (PROSE: Wandering Stars [+]Loading...["Wandering Stars (short story)"])
Her birthday was the 16th of August. (PROSE: Our Tune [+]Loading...["Our Tune (short story)"])
The Eighth Doctor speculated that "a faction of paradox inducing psychopaths from the future" had retroactively injected Iris into his past, or that she was from another reality where all the times she claimed to have met him, and which he did not remember, really did happen. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"]) She did, in fact, meet him out of the correct sequence, which created events in his past that shouldn't technically have happened. (PROSE: Verdigris [+]Loading...["Verdigris (novel)"])
On Earth[[edit] | [edit source]]
During the latter half of the 20th century, Iris lived on Earth (specifically Camden Town), as a lesbian novelist. (PROSE: Hospitality [+]Loading...["Hospitality (short story)"])
Lilith[[edit] | [edit source]]
On Gallifrey[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris talked about her mother leaving with an older man, an offworlder, when Iris was young, leaving her to grow up with a dozen older, matriarchal "Aunts" in a great house in the mountains of Gallifrey's southern hemisphere. They were perpetually kept inside their house, which had hundreds of storeys, by fierce snow. Her favourite Aunt was Baba, who had a shawl made from the feathers of every bird her people knew, with which she could travel anywhere in the world. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"], Enter Wildthyme [+]Loading...["Enter Wildthyme (novel)"]) While living in the House, she was called Lilith. (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"])
As a child, Lilith went to the base of the mountains with her friend Alison and found a deserted fishing village. When Lilith stood with Alison at the village's pier, she saw dozens of small sharp-toothed white fish and was startled. She fell into the water and quickly grabbed a beam and pulled herself out. While this was going on, Alison laughed at Lilith's misfortune. After this incident, Lilith never trusted Alison again. (PROSE: First Meetings [+]Loading...["First Meetings (short story)"])
After her Aunts died one by one, Iris travelled to her planet's main city to demand a place in the elite society. But she only found bickering old men who knew the secrets of the cosmos but would not do anything, (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"], The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"]) and would not let a woman like Iris in even though their president was a woman. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"]) She said that she found her bus abandoned and dying in the mountains and coaxed it back to health, (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"], Verdigris [+]Loading...["Verdigris (novel)"]) and that it told her what to do with her life. (PROSE: Verdigris [+]Loading...["Verdigris (novel)"])
The Third Doctor said that Iris wasn't a "proper Time Lady": she was a commoner, from somewhere like the New Towns under the Capitol. (PROSE: Verdigris [+]Loading...["Verdigris (novel)"]) She claimed at times to be Gallifreyan, (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"]) but also that her home was the Obverse. (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"], et al.) The Sixth Doctor noted that he was unable to find any record of her on Gallifrey, because she had erased herself from the records. (AUDIO: The Wormery [+]Loading...["The Wormery (audio story)"]) Her bus was a TARDIS. (PROSE: Old Flames [+]Loading...["Old Flames (short story)"])
In the Clockworks[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris told Panda that she was a kid from the slums miles outside the Clockworks. She managed to inveigle her way into Clockworks society, but she thought it was terribly dull, so she stole the Celestial Omnibus and escaped. (AUDIO: The Land of Wonder [+]Loading...["The Land of Wonder (audio story)"])
Lilith investigated the forest at the heart of Saga City, where she met Eliot, a tree containing a map of the multiverse. She went through Eliot and found herself outside Saga City, near Wherewithal House. The House's Aunts took her in, hoping that her family would find her and reward them. A boy named Dick discovered Panda and the bus, which had both already travelled with her in her future, out in the desert. Panda helped her get the bus going again and they escaped through the Ringpull to the outside universe, where she first began her travels. (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"])
In Greek Space[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris was also the Greek goddess of the rainbow. She once lived with the other gods, whom she considered her family, in Greek Space, where she painted the palace of Olympos in gaudy reds, greens and blues. Sometimes she was the mother of Eros, but not always, as the gods' relationships and histories tended to change. (PROSE: Wandering Stars [+]Loading...["Wandering Stars (short story)"])
As fiction[[edit] | [edit source]]
- Main article: Iris Wildthyme in popular culture and mythology
Iris was aware that her life was "a series of stories that involve[d] paradoxes, time travel, mind control, virtual selves, cloning, regression, reincarnation, talking vegetables, cybernetics, regeneration, prolepsis, analepsis, alternative dimensional instabilities, metatextuality, allegory, satire, fantasy, revisionism, cliches, plagiarism, and hoodwinkery". She also knew that she was a deliberate parody of Doctor Who. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"])
After Iris attended a party within a newborn Paul Magrs's dream, (PROSE: In the Sixties [+]Loading...["In the Sixties (short story)"]) Paul grew up, and by the 21st century he and Iris knew about each other, and Paul wrote books about Iris (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"]) which grew in popularity (PROSE: Brenda's B&B [+]Loading...["Brenda's B&B (short story)"]) until the series became part of mainstream culture, even having a TV series. (PROSE: The Magrs Conundrum! [+]Loading...["The Magrs Conundrum! (short story)"])
Paul and Iris were also friends, (PROSE: Party Fears Two [+]Loading...["Party Fears Two (short story)"], The Magrs Conundrum! [+]Loading...["The Magrs Conundrum! (short story)"]) and Paul was in a relationship with Jeremy (PROSE: Party Fears Two [+]Loading...["Party Fears Two (short story)"]) who previously travelled with Iris. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"])
John Cleavis once came up with a story about a "strange old aunt" who "happened to own a double-decker bus that [could] travel to [a] magical world". (PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen [+]Loading...["Mad Dogs and Englishmen (novel)"])
In one meta-dimension, Iris existed only as a fictional character. (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"], AUDIO: Looking for a Friend [+]Loading...["Looking for a Friend (audio story)"]) The seventeen-episode The Iris Wildthyme Show inspired a cult franchise with CDs, action figures, comics, fan conventions, and over 300 tie-in novels. (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond! [+]Loading...["Wildthyme Beyond! (novel)"])
In his youth, Arthur Bayer wrote several stories about a woman who travelled through time and space in a double-decker bus with a panda. (AUDIO: Looking for a Friend [+]Loading...["Looking for a Friend (audio story)"])
"Edith Sitwell" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Paul Magrs, a biographer, once wrote that the first incarnation of Iris was "rather like Edith Sitwell as she's described in Denton Welch's memoirs", (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"]) a sentiment that was corroborated by other sources. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron [+]Loading...["The Golden Hendecahedron (short story)"], From Wildthyme with Love [+]Loading...["From Wildthyme with Love (novel)"])
Iris met the Doctor in his first incarnation shortly after he ran away from Gallifrey. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress [+]Loading...["The Scarlet Empress (novel)"])
On one occasion, Iris was brought to a desolate wilderness with a tower in it by PAND-R. There she encountered four of her other selves and fought the Voodi, the Gaar, the Bummies, and the Chumbloids before defeating PAND-R in the tower. During the adventure, Iris cackled they were lucky only the "rubbish monsters" had been pooper scoopered to the wilderness. (PROSE: From Wildthyme with Love [+]Loading...["From Wildthyme with Love (novel)"])
Iris came to August 1984 to track down some alien creatures, but they realised they were being followed and made her bus the size of a toy. She mostly escaped the bus before she could be squished, but found her foot stuck in it. A boy named Andrew wandered by and used a screwdriver he had in his pocket to mess with the bus's miniature controls and disconnect the etheric solenoids. The bus quickly grew back to normal size and Iris invited Andrew into the bus to have lemonade and seed cake. The creatures had already left during the time Iris' foot was stuck, so she also left after saying farewell to Andrew. (PROSE: Dog Days of Summer [+]Loading...["Dog Days of Summer (short story)"])
"Shirley Bassey" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris' next incarnation resembled the singer Shirley Bassey in her prime (PROSE:Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"]) and often used the name "Brenda Soobie", going long periods of time without using the "Iris Wildthyme" moniker. (PROSE: Death of the Author [+]Loading...["Death of the Author (short story)"]) She was either the second (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron [+]Loading...["The Golden Hendecahedron (short story)"]) or the third Iris. (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"])
She was skilled at darts. (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"])
Biography[[edit] | [edit source]]
For a while, Iris made money by posing as Shirley Bassey. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion [+]Loading...["Bafflement and Devotion (short story)"])
She took to the life of a singer and began calling herself Brenda Soobie. Under this alias, she performed in places such as Las Vegas and Vega and released "a ton" of records. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron [+]Loading...["The Golden Hendecahedron (short story)"])
Brenda visited 1960s Las Vegas where she met the Eighth Doctor, along with his companions Fitz Kreiner and Anji Kapoor. It was also here where she met Noël Coward for the first time (PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen [+]Loading...["Mad Dogs and Englishmen (novel)"]) and threw a party for all sorts of friends of hers, including a large number of authors, and another version of herself. (PROSE: Party Fears Two [+]Loading...["Party Fears Two (short story)"])
While in Vegas with Panda, Brenda Soobie partied backstage at the Flamingo Hotel with Elvis and Priscilla Presley. They stumbled upon an alien plot to abduct the Presleys and ended up chased through the hotel by an android duplicate of Tom Jones deployed as part of the masterplan, until they managed to escape through a portal that connected to the changing room mirror of the Shopkeeper's shop in Samhain.
The old man already knew other, later versions of Iris, but this was her first meeting with him, and her first visit to the town, from her perspective. Exploring the town with Panda, she met the RifKind, living stuffed animals left behind by a writer who'd left Samhain behind twelve years ago and moved back to the "normal world", going over Hebden Bridge. Panda and Brenda tracked him down in the company of Wise Old Mog, finding him disillusioned with his attempts at a serious writing career, and helped inspire him to return to his beloved puppet characters. The three then returned to Samhain. (PROSE: Death of the Author [+]Loading...["Death of the Author (short story)"])
Iris travelled to Scotland in 1447 and helped a burly warlord get out of a well he had fallen into. She beat the warlord in a caber tossing contest and posed for an oil painting called "Posing with unknown Scottish warlord". (PROSE: Iris at the V&A [+]Loading...["Iris at the V&A (short story)"])
Accompanied by "a black boy in a silver, figure-hugging spacesuit", Iris encountered a mustachioed incarnation of the Doctor in the City of Glass on Valcea. (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"])
Appearance[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris "famously" had a beehive hairstyle. She was known to wear an evening dress with a feather boa. (PROSE: The Blue Angel [+]Loading...["The Blue Angel (novel)"])
"Beryl Reid" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
The next Iris resembled Beryl Reid. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion) She was either the third (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron) or the fifth Iris. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress) This incarnation was often indistinct from the incarnation of Iris contemporary to Panda. (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns, PROSE: From Wildthyme with Love, et al.)
Biography[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris encountered the Fourth Doctor in 1764. She was trying to obtain a house in every century and had brought Edwin Turner to marry Bella Huntingdon, thereby gaining the Huntingdon estate. In fact, the Huntingdons were of an alien species and Lady Huntingdon wanted Iris' TARDIS so she could return to her home world. When Iris refused, Lady Huntingdon raced to the TARDIS and attacked Iris when she got there. The Doctor was able to trap Lady Huntingdon in a message pod. With her plan failed, Iris simply left 1764, leaving Turner trapped in the past. (PROSE: Old Flames)
Iris was part of the Sisterhood of Karn for a couple of years and was one of those present crying 'Death!' when the Fourth Doctor paid Karn a visit. (PROSE: Verdigris)
Jenny Winterleaf[[edit] | [edit source]]
When Iris parked her bus in a side street in Sunderland in 1991, a traffic warden named Jenny Winterleaf wandered onto the bus thinking it was a normal bus. Iris left before Jenny could get off and the two were stuck together for several years of adventures. (PROSE: The Dreadful Flap)
The first place that Iris took Jenny to was ancient Mexico, where Iris stole a ceremonial bracelet. This enraged the locals and Montezuma swore that he would have his revenge on Iris. (PROSE: Iris Wildthyme y Señor Cientocinco contra Los Monstruos del Fiesta)
Iris and Jenny fought Spiritus Mundi, (PROSE: Only Living Girls) visited the Super Hotel Miramar, (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme) and helped the Second Doctor defeat the Dalek Supreme in the diamond mines of Marlion. (PROSE: Verdigris, Bafflement and Devotion, AUDIO: Excelis Dawns)
After four years of travels, Iris landed in 1996 England. Jenny took this chance to stop travelling with Iris and return to her native time and place. (PROSE: The Dreadful Flap)
Tom[[edit] | [edit source]]
Many years after meeting her other selves in the Death Zone and sometime after her travels with Jenny, Iris parked her bus in London somewhere between Piccadilly and Old Compton Street in early November 2000. Tom came into her bus wanting to go to Putney Common.
A month into their travels, Iris and Tom visited 1973 and aided the Third Doctor in defeating Verdigris. (PROSE: Verdigris)
Tom left Iris when they got into an argument during an adventure in the 1990s. Tom refused to continue travelling with Iris and left her. He went on to write a series of books based on his adventures with Iris. (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large)
Final adventure[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris encountered the Eighth Doctor and Sam Jones on Hyspero and participated in a quest across the planet to reunite the Four. She ate a Kaled mutant during this period, which proved harmful and forced her to regenerate. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
Personality[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris was not fond of the Doctor's seventh incarnation. She once described him to the Eighth Doctor as "a portentous little feller, swaggering around, thinking he's got all the world's darkest secrets under his hat." Furthermore, she thought that he was "a pretentious old thing" who "got on [her] nerves" as he regarded himself as the Guardian of Forever and Time's Champion. She held the Decayed Master in a similarly low regard, referring to him as "that pitiful, deluded phallocentric dope." (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
"Jane Fonda" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris' new body resembled the actress Jane Fonda in her prime. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress) Accounts differ as to whether she was the fourth Iris, (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron, Wandering Stars et al.) the sixth Iris, (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, Femme Fatale, The Blue Angel) or even a future incarnation. Though by this account, like many others, the incarnation contemporary to Panda was indistinct from Iris' "Beryl Reid" incarnation. (PROSE: From Wildthyme with Love)
Biography[[edit] | [edit source]]
Solo adventures[[edit] | [edit source]]
One of the first things Iris did after regenerating was send a video of her regeneration to the Eighth Doctor and Sam. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
Iris met the Eighth Doctor in Paris, 1934 and also in the Obverse. (PROSE: Femme Fatale, The Blue Angel)
During a time in which the Eighth Doctor was travelling with Iris in her TARDIS, she chatted with him over how similar their lives were, as well as mentioning the Doctor's seemingly inadvertent influence on Earth fiction.. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion)
Iris took Marlene Dietrich and Carlos Esteban to 4281, where they fought a Tarixion Gas Fiend. (PROSE: Iris at the V&A)
Iris had several adventures with the crew of the Anathema in the 79th century. They visited Pyras, encountered robots in a historical theme park, and got captured by Duke Anubis. During this time, she developed a bond with Captain Rex Halidom. (PROSE: Battleship Anathema)
Iris visited 17th century Samhain and married Michael Drake, a man who had already married one of Iris' future incarnations. (PROSE: Michael Drake)
Iris once attended a party inside the dream of a newborn, hosted by Dr Oho and "another Iris", Iris Murdoch. She ended up "fooling around" with Robin, Batman's sidekick. (PROSE: In the Sixties)
Working for UNIT[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris worked part-time as UNIT's special scientific advisor in the mid-1990s. During this time, "a couple of people in Geneva" repeatedly asked how easy it would be to put a base on the Moon.
In 1996, the Remote sold a dangerous alien weapon at COPEX. Iris asked UNISYC to tell her what was going on, but they refused. After the Eighth Doctor dealt with the situation, Iris was interviewed by Sarah Jane Smith for the documentary Voodoo Economics. (PROSE: Interference)
In early 1997, Iris went on vacation. (PROSE: Bullet Time)
Post-War universe[[edit] | [edit source]]
In the post-War universe, Iris visited the Eighth Doctor and his daughter Miranda at his house in Kent in the 1980s. The Doctor was suffering from amnesia at the time, so Iris tried to explain to him a few things. She only succeeded in confusing him. The Doctor let Iris sleep in a spare bedroom of his house for a couple nights. During this time the Doctor walked in on Iris while she was taking a bath. (PROSE: Father Time)
The Eighth Doctor and Marnal saw a vision of the four surviving elementals that included a "young woman with long blonde hair in an extraordinary piece of haute couture". (PROSE: The Gallifrey Chronicles)
Travelling with Panda[[edit] | [edit source]]
Needs info from From Wildthyme with Love and Iris Wildthyme of Mars
For a while, Iris travelled with Panda. (PROSE: From Wildthyme with Love) Many of their adventures involved the planet Mars. (PROSE: Green Mars Blues et al.)
Growing old[[edit] | [edit source]]
Having lived a long life, this incarnation of Iris aged visibly and grew her hair out into a long white braid that trailed behind her. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
Iris once proposed to the Doctor on the Bridge of Sighs in Venice, when she appeared to be a woman in her sixties, with long white hair that reached to the ground. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress) The Doctor, in his third incarnation, had recently left Jo behind. He suggested they team up to defeat a common foe; Iris misinterpreted this as seduction. (AUDIO: The Wormery)
Fifth Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris' fifth incarnation had an easy going personality. She dyed her hair red and wore clothing similar to a rock star from the 1970s.
On one occasion, Iris had to explode something in space. Due to the fact that sound could not travel in the vacuum of space, Iris closed one of her eyes, but kept the other open to make sure the explosion happened. The explosion caused a dispersal of pigment in Iris' open eye and it changed colour from brown to blue. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
However, other accounts indicate that the fifth Iris was the one that resembled Beryl Reid. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, The Blue Angel)
"Katy Manning" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Perhaps in her sixth incarnation (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron) or an incarnation indistinct from her "Beryl Reid" incarnation, (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns, Wildthyme at Large, et al.) this incarnation of Iris Wildthyme resembled a certain actress and she was well known for her life of obfuscation. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme, AUDIO: Iris Wildthyme Speaks...!, et al.)
She was often described by others as a Lancastrian, (PROSE: The Party in Room Four, A Tingle of Happiness) and Iris herself knew that she was attractive and intelligent, but she also hid behind a façade of drunkenness to stymie her loneliness. (AUDIO: Iris Wildthyme Speaks...!) She fancied every Doctor except the Sixth Doctor. (AUDIO: The Wormery)
By the time of this incarnation, she was at least 900 years old, (AUDIO: The Two Irises) and she spent many, many years adventuring. (PROSE: Framed, AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large, Iris Wildthyme Speaks...!)
According to one account, Iris was incapable of regeneration and this was her only body left. (AUDIO: The Elixir of Doom)
Biography[[edit] | [edit source]]
Alone[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris joined the Little Sisters of Excelis on Artaris to repent for her sins, but Jolene had concerns about her, as she talked about men and still smoked and drank. Her memory was scrambled and couldn't fully remember her previous adventures on the Celestial Omnibus. The Mother Superior sent her to accompany Grayvorn in his search for The Relic, where she encountered the Fifth Doctor. She was worried about how he was more careful in this incarnation. She discovered the the Relic was an old handbag which contained an energy that could affect souls. She lost it again. (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns)
Iris decided to take a drink in Bianca's Bar where she met the Sixth Doctor and faced Bianca, her own evil future self, who attempted to steal her remaining regenerations. (AUDIO: The Wormery)
Iris met Robin Hood and his Merry Men and introduced them to time travel. (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large)
Tom & Panda[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris reunited with her old friend Tom, entrusting him with the Memory Crystal from the Mines of Marlion. She then tried to take refuge with Robin Hood, who betrayed her to an entity known as the Head, a "higher power" intent on stealing Iris' memories. The Head forced her to pilot her bus to Tom, and it attempted to take the Memory Crystal, until Panda grabbed it and destroyed it, on instruction from Iris. (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large)
Her memories started to appear in Panda. She said that she learned medicine from Lister. Iris thought she was becoming the cowardly lion from the Wizard of Oz. (AUDIO: The Devil in Ms. Wildthyme)
Shortly afterwards, the trio attended the unveiling of the Hendecahedron, an eleven-sided power source created as part of a collaboration between Allis and Ballis and Zelopan. Due to the temporal residue on Iris and her companions, the Hendecahedron became unstable. Iris shut down the Hendecahedron, but during the process was hit by a bolt which pinched her timeline. She split into two Irises: one that aged backwards and regressed through Iris' past selves and one that aged forwards and turned into several possible future incarnations. During this confusion, Zelopan tried to steal Iris' bus by impersonating the sixth Iris. The two Irises stopped Zelopan from tricking Tom and Panda and unpinched their timeline by holding hands. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
Iris, Tom, and Panda visited Xanadu and encountered Kubla Khan, who gave Iris a hookah. (PROSE: Iris Wildthyme y Señor Cientocinco contra Los Monstruos del Fiesta)
The trio decided to relax by going to an acupuncturist in Lowestoft, but their acupuncturist turned out to be the Acupuncturist, an evil retired Clockworks who was going by an alias that was an anagram of his name. Iris used a lighter and some fireworks she had in her handbag to defeat the Acupuncturist.
Iris discovered an old freighter spaceship that was going to crash onto prehistoric Earth and kill all of the dinosaurs. Tom almost died on the spaceship, but after seventeen attempts Iris was able to get him off of it before it crashed. She eventually prevented it from crashing into Earth, although she accidentally left Panda on the ship and came back for him two weeks after she left. (PROSE: Future Legend)
Tom left to be with a man with whom he had fallen in love during one of the trio's adventures on Earth circa 2008, leaving Iris and Panda travelling without him. (AUDIO: The Sound of Fear, The Dreadful Flap)
Adventures with Panda[[edit] | [edit source]]
Further info from Many Happy Returns needs to be added
Iris and Panda then travelled to Radio Yesterday and met Iris' husband Sam Gold. (AUDIO: The Sound of Fear) The pair continued travelling together for a long time though the two often fell out. (PROSE: Couch Potatoes, Future Legend)
Having locked Panda away in a cupboard on the Omnibus, (AUDIO: Many Happy Returns) Iris travelled to Artaris again in the 27th century, where she met Bernice Summerfield. She showed Benny some of the local hot spots. She came to Artaris to get the Relic back so she could wear it as an accessory. She got drunk with Benny. She worked out that Snyper was manipulating the situation. She later helped Benny to escape her cage and then to discover the truth about the plagues. (AUDIO: The Plague Herds of Excelis) After this adventure, Iris dropped the drunken Bernice off on the space liner the Empress to take her home, telling her to act like she owned the place. (AUDIO: The Dance of the Dead)
She was rather fond of using logic bombs in her investigations. She could fix vehicles better than her bus. She was exiled by the people of the Clockworks to 1972. She travelled to wonderland. (AUDIO: The Land of Wonder)
During their travels, Iris and Panda encountered George W. Bush, (PROSE: Chicken Fried Banana Republic) Marlene Dietrich, (PROSE: The Scarlet Shadow) Professor Challenger (PROSE: The Found World) and Sherlock Holmes. (PROSE: The Shape of Things) She met Hilary Wildthyme after Panda opened his hipflask. She went into rehab and created Hilary as a decoy. (AUDIO: The Two Irises)
Iris dropped her gin and tonic into the vortex and caused a rip. After she lost Panda when he jumped into a rift to save the multiverse, (AUDIO: The Panda Invasion) she spent many years searching for him and eventually turned to Santa Claus for help. Iris and Santa found that Santa's ex-wife, Mary Christmas had kidnapped Panda. Iris used Clockworks technology to regress Mary's mind to a time when she and Santa were happy together. She then left with Panda for new adventures. (AUDIO: Iris Wildthyme and the Claws of Santa)
For an extended period, Iris and Panda were pursed by a Monstron time destroyer piloted by an unknown enemy. (AUDIO: The Iris Wildthyme Appreciation Society) Iris installed a randomiser in the bus to evade the craft, but its pursuit continued until the pilot - a bitter future version of Iris - caught up with them in the town of Midwinter Leys in Warwickshire and attacked them. (AUDIO: Iris Rides Out, Midwinter Murders) The future Iris captured Panda and her younger self and sent them to a Pleasure Prison, where the pair were immersed in separate virtual realities designed to provide their greatest desires. Iris and Panda were able to escape the program after remembering how much each needed the other. (AUDIO: Whatever Happened to Iris Wildthyme?)
After this, Iris met Ted Taylor, an up-and-coming professional darts player who fulfilled his prophesied destiny by becoming a quantum superbeing and waging war on the Bovians, a cow-like alien race. (AUDIO: Iris at the Oche)
A jingle got in her head and she passed it on to Panda. Iris then decided to go and find the source the jingle and tracked it to Jupiter. It turned out the Lift was trying to wipe the minds of humanity. (AUDIO: A Lift in Time)
Iris and Panda attended a book launch party at Shaftsbury Avenue in 2010. Afterwards, they relaxed in the omnibus with Elspeth May. George Mann drew a picture of them while this was going on. (PROSE: Iris at the V&A)
She stayed in Paris for a while and hosted many soirees where the artists of Paris partied. She encountered Hex in a cafe and invited to model for her nude. She wanted to convince Hex to help her, and declared war on the Seventh Doctor when he wanted to stop her plans. Iris knew that Dora Muse was wanting artists to feed herself and managed to send all the artist away. This was her plan to defeat Dora on the Queen of Braak's orders. She dived into the Seine to save Panda when he fell off the roof after being possessed by Dora. She survived the drop by materialising the bus around her and Kevin. (AUDIO: Muse of Fire)
Adventures with Panda, Simon, and Barbra[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris began to investigate strange happenings in Darlington, and pretended to be a writer when she met with Simon and Kelly. She started to become suspicious of Anthony Marvelle and his Poodle Missy. After finding out from MIAOW about a set of mysterious objects that had landed in Darlington, she took Simon and Kelly to find one of them in Simon's bookshop: the Objet D'Oom. However, it had been stolen by Marvelle. Iris took them to an alternate Paris in 1894 before the Martian arrived. Using an information crystal stolen by Barbra, leaving Kelly behind, they travelled to Valcea. Shortly afterwards her bus was vandalised by Marvelle when searching for Iris' Journals for information on the planet Hyspero. Unable to travel through time until the bus' windows were fixed, she travelled to the glass city. The inhabitants of the city fixed the bus. Inside the city, she found out that it contained a door to the planet Hyspero and that Mervelle wanted to enter the Obverse with the help of the kidnapped Kelly and Jenny Winterleaf. Unable to diffuse a bomb a local Bartender placed in Barbra, she escaped on her bus with Panda and Simon to Hyspero. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme)
She planned on catching up with Marvelle but got worried when her bus would not travel through time. She also thought that her memories of Hyspero were deliberately removed. She became delighted when she found a pub in the middle of the desert. Shortly afterwards she decided to find Fenster and consulted with him. Fenster then took her to Saga City which had been moved to the planet from the Obverse. She started to wonder how long she had known Panda as she had memories of seeing Panda when she was a child which was before she encountered him with Tom. She was rescued from the populace by her childhood friend Dick. She encountered Eliot who told her the way to escape the city and return to the bus, using the streams that flowed to the surface. She managed to catch up to Marvelle before he opened the Ringpull, but she startled him and he dropped the Objet D'Oom which killed Euphemia. She then travelled to an alternate dimension where she was a fictional being. (PROSE: Wildthyme Beyond!)
Jo Jones[[edit] | [edit source]]
After dropping Panda off somewhere to complete a mission for her, Iris met Jo Jones while on Earth in 2010 and took her to meet the Third Doctor in the 1970s. After this, Jo and Iris began to travel together. (AUDIO: Find and Replace) On one occasion, Iris and Jo arrived in Los Angeles, 1930s. While there, they encountered the Eighth Doctor, and together defeated a movie star who was turning Vita Monets' husbands into monstrous characters using an elixir left behind by Iris on a previous misadventure. (AUDIO: The Elixir of Doom)
Returning to Turner[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris returned for Captain Turner, whom she had left trapped in the past, and travelled with him on many new adventures. She took him to 2015 where she wanted to buy him some derivatives of Jane Austen's work. Here she discovered a book by Kronos Vad which did not exist. She went back in time to stop Sherlock Holmes from being killed in an explosion. (AUDIO: Kronos Vad's History of Earth (Vol. 36,379))
She had a crush on Brian Bonamy and often went into the 1980s to see him. She met him again in Margate in 2015, where she found out he was under contract by the Scorchies. (AUDIO: Comeback of the Scorchies)
Iris then took Turner to Pink Gables, her house on the Moon. (AUDIO: Dark Side) When she visited Fergusons she found Cassie Burdock who told her future. (AUDIO: Oracle of the Supermarket)
Iris did not think that Chloe Fothergill died by accident so she proceeded to investigate her death. She was good at picking locks. (AUDIO: Murder at the Abbey)
She once took Turner to the Giza. (AUDIO: The Slots of Giza)
She then took him to her favourite place in the universe: the Garden in the Clouds. (AUDIO: High Spirits)
She battled Nora and, after meeting a werewolf, she placed Turner back with Chloe Fothergill. (AUDIO: An Extraterrestrial Werewolf in Belgium)
After she parted ways with Turner again, she went searching for Panda, not able to find her most faithful companion. She met a human version of Panda named Arthur Bayer. (AUDIO: Looking for a Friend)
Later years[[edit] | [edit source]]
Many years after her adventures with Panda and Simon, Iris encountered them while investigating a Vince Cosmos concert in 1973. (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme)
Appearance[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris had a tattoo of a "bumblebee riding a bike." (AUDIO: Iris Rides Out)
Other Irises[[edit] | [edit source]]
"Margaret Rutherford" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
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One incarnation looked like Margaret Rutherford and, believing that the murders were real, appeared as Miss Marple in the film Murder, She Said. (PROSE: Iris at the V&A)
"Phyllis" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Following the "Sixth Iris", this incarnation of Iris looked like Phyllis from The Pruitts of Southampton. Despite her age, she wore a green mini-dress, white gogo boots, and a white wig made of candyfloss. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
"Puppet" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Following the "Phyllis Iris", this incarnation of Iris lost a wager over a game of interplanetary Kerplunk! to the Gamemaster. Thus, she had to spend this incarnation as a marionette with a long nose and chin. This Iris could possess people by latching onto their arms and talking through their mouths. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
"Drag" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Following the "Puppet Iris", this incarnation of Iris appeared to be a tall, dark-skinned man with a honey-coloured wig. Iris had been black and a man before, just not at the same time. Despite this appearance, "she" was "always a lady". (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
"Carol Channing" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
Following the "Drag Iris" and two unmentioned incarnations, this incarnation of Iris looked like Carol Channing. She was tall and wore a man's suit with a gaudy floral pattern. She had white hair and a pipe between her teeth. (PROSE: The Golden Hendecahedron)
"Celebrity" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
A future incarnation of Iris, who was described by Iris' sixth Incarnation as "leggy", while Panda compared her to a rugby player. This incarnation wrote an autobiography, Ugg Boots and Catsuits: My Fabulous Life. Due to the autobiography's popularity, a TV show based off it was made. The TV show starred the same Iris that wrote the autobiography, but Panda only appeared in the pilot episode of the series before he was replaced by an Australian kangaroo named Hoppy. (AUDIO: The Iris Wildthyme Appreciation Society)
Bianca[[edit] | [edit source]]
Bianca acted as Iris' equivalent of the Valeyard. Working with a group of psychic worms, Bianca rebuilt her TARDIS as a nightclub at a dimensional nexus. From there she endeavoured to bring ultimate harmony to the universe, and to steal the remaining regenerations from Iris. The plans failed when her club was destroyed, and she faded out of existence. (AUDIO: The Wormery)
Hilary Wildthyme[[edit] | [edit source]]
- Main article: Hilary Wildthyme
Iris' Celestial Omnibus once generated a projection of Hilary Wildthyme, a male incarnation of Iris. (AUDIO: The Two Irises)
Wor Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
The Wor Iris was the second wife of Michael Drake. (PROSE: Michael Drake)
"Monster" Iris[[edit] | [edit source]]
One incarnation of Iris was a non-humanoid, cyclopian "Monster" who refused to visit any plant she'd previously visited in any timeframe. (PROSE: Untitled No. 22)
Undated events[[edit] | [edit source]]
On one occasion, Iris spent Christmas with the Fifth Doctor, Adric, Nyssa and Tegan Jovanka. Iris adored the Fifth Doctor but also worried about him being so serious lately, stating that he did not seem as fun as he used to be. Iris was fond of Adric and was devastated to hear of his untimely death. However, she was not fond of Tegan, describing her as "that shrill Australian woman." (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns)
At some point to her "Brenda Soobie" incarnation's first encounter with the Shopkeeper, Iris had sex with Jimi Hendrix. (PROSE: Death of the Author)
She claimed to have been present for the Great Fire of London in September 1666. (AUDIO: Excelis Dawns)
She was in London in March 1868 when the Doctor and Nyssa were stranded there due to Thomas Brewster accidentally sending the TARDIS on a solo flight. The Doctor decided against requesting Iris' assistance in retrieving it. (AUDIO: The Boy That Time Forgot)
She once shared breakfast with US President Abraham Lincoln on the White House lawn in the 1860s after saving the United States from Martian invaders for the third time. She told George Strangeways that they had "such a laugh." She also met Napoléon Bonaparte on the Russian front in 1812 and claimed that, in spite of what the history books said, he was "anything but small." (AUDIO: The Panda Invasion)
Iris dealt with Cephalopods in Venice with the help of Alistair Gordon Lethbridge-Stewart and one of the Doctor's early incarnations. Iris also encountered Lethbridge-Stewart when they fought the Terrible Zodin on Mars. (PROSE: Verdigris)
Iris requested entry to the City of the Saved in order to remove various friends from the Civil War. First she claimed she had a strand of human DNA in her sixth incarnation; when that did not work, she drove her vehicle directly at the Uptime Gate. (PROSE: A Hundred Words from a Civil War)
Iris entered a GalMart auction under the name "Route22" to bid on a Mark Three Type-Forty TT capsule because she needed it for spare parts. Upon finding out its exterior resembled a police box, she backed out of the auction. (PROSE: Buyer's Remorse)
Celestial Omnibus[[edit] | [edit source]]
- Main article: Celestial Omnibus
Iris Wildthyme's TARDIS, (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, et al.) also known as the "Celestial Omnibus", (PROSE: Enter Wildthyme, et al.) or simply "the Bus," (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large, et al.) resembled a red London double decker bus, specifically the Number 22 to Putney Common. Lacking the standard dimensional transcendence exhibited by other TARDISes, it was smaller inside than out. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress, et al)
Iris Wildthyme's companions[[edit] | [edit source]]
Captain Turner[[edit] | [edit source]]
Captain Edwin Turner had one trip with Iris before he left to marry Bella Huntingdon. (PROSE: Old Flames) He later rejoined her in further adventures. (AUDIO: Kronos Vad's History of Earth (Vol. 36,379))
Jeremy[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris once travelled with "glamorous" Jeremy, who helped Iris foil the 2150s Dalek invasion of Earth and was with her in the Cyber-Tombs on Telos. (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
Jeremy would later meet Paul Magrs, and would welcome Fester Cat into their home. (PROSE: Party Fears Two, et al.)
Jenny Winterleaf[[edit] | [edit source]]
Jenny was a traffic warden who once helped Iris fight the Dalek Supreme alongside the Second Doctor. She used to get diarrhoea whenever they went through the vortex. (PROSE: Verdigris)
Paul Magrs[[edit] | [edit source]]
While Paul Magrs wasn't Iris' companion in the conventional sense, as he never travelled with Iris in her bus, they had a relationship that began when Iris visited the newborn Paul in his first dream. (PROSE: In the Sixties)
Later on in his life, Paul began writing and publishing stories based upon Iris, which would eventually include Panda, Brenda and Effie. (PROSE: Bafflement and Devotion, Brenda's B&B, The Magrs Conundrum!)
Thomas Daley[[edit] | [edit source]]
Tom and his talking panda travelled with Iris for some time, before he returned to Earth. Iris came looking for Tom once more. While on Earth, Tom wrote mildy successful books about his travels with Iris, although most people regarded the books as fiction. (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large)
Martha[[edit] | [edit source]]
Martha was a poodle from dogworld. (PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englishmen)
Panda[[edit] | [edit source]]
Panda looked like a stuffed panda. He liked more than a drop of alcohol and was a freelance journalist in 1972. He would often get self-conscious at any mention of him being stuffed or looking like a toy panda. He continued to travel with Iris even after Tom departed. (AUDIO: The Land of Wonder)
Jo Jones[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris befriended the Doctor's former companion Jo Jones in 2010. Jo joined Iris on her travels, happy to once again be a time traveller. (AUDIO: Find and Replace, The Elixir of Doom)
Others[[edit] | [edit source]]
Iris once travelled with Timmy, Gary and Jeremy (all separately). (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
Iris once referred to one of her former companions as "an obtuse shape-shifter who loved nothing better than to spend much of his time as a lippy and garrulous penguin". (PROSE: The Scarlet Empress)
Flossie and Fritter joined Iris following an adventure with the Doctor and Noël Coward. (PROSE: Mad Dogs and Englismen)
Behind the scenes[[edit] | [edit source]]
- Iris can be regarded as a crossover character. Creator Paul Magrs states in his afterword to The Scarlet Empress that his first (unpublished) novel, written in his university days and described as "rather surreal", was entitled Iris Wildethyme. Iris Margaret Wildthyme was also one of the main characters of Magrs' first published novel, Marked for Life. There, Iris is a lesbian novelist who claims to have lived for 474 years and changed sex five times, "like Orlando"; she has memories of visiting Dunwich in the 1860s, meeting Marlene Dietrich in 1920s Berlin, and writing a popular novel (which was later adapted into a film) in 1960s Los Angeles. At the end of Marked for Life, Iris transforms into a baby after suffering what should have been a fatal fall. Iris reappears in Magrs' next two novels Does it Show? and Could it be Magic? as "an ugly-looking baby with an old look about it" and a toddler respectively. Despite her somewhat different circumstances, Iris' involvement in the plot of these last three novels is referenced in the context of the Time Lady Iris in Magrs' The Blue Angel.
- Magrs' first published work, Patient Iris, was about a dying elderly hospital patient named Iris. He explained that she had no connection to Iris Wildthyme, but admitted that he seemed to use the name a lot and that "she's always a kind of mystic or valkyrie figure"
- Iris Wildthyme can be described as a meta-fictional character, able to comment on the world she is in, and on the Doctor's own adventures from a point of view removed from the normal narrative structures. The "old woman" Iris Wildthyme appears like actor Beryl Reid (who has guest-starred on Doctor Who). On audio, Katy Manning supplies the voice for the character; her image is usually also used to depict the character, as on the cover of Iris Wildthyme and the Celestial Omnibus.
- Along with Bernice Summerfield, Wildthyme is one of the more prolific Doctor Who universe characters never to appear on screen (although Bernice did appear in the animated webcast Dead and Buried and live-action webcast Transmission from Mars).
- To date, Katy Manning and Maria McErlane are the only actors to portray Iris officially. None of Iris' other incarnations have as yet been portrayed in audio form.
External links[[edit] | [edit source]]
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